Lent begins. hunger sets in.

Today is the first day of Lent, and about the only thing that I have done to celebrate was to eat pancakes last night for Fat Tuesday (Is that a real tradition? I think it was just an excuse my friends gave so we could go eat pancakes.) I missed Fuller's chapel this morning where they had an Ash Wednesday service. I really needed to go running w/ Jonathan this morning. I've been getting antsy. And fat. (Those pancakes certainly didn't help.)

I plan on participating in this Lenten weblog devoted to reflections on Miroslav Volf's new book, Free of Charge. I got the book for free for being part of the Emergent Conversation with Volf in early February. The book is the official 2006 Lenten Devotional as designated by the Archbishop of Canterbury. It's an important book for our day and age, dealing with issues of giving and forgiving, both of which are very difficult for those of us mired in the modern world. Yet these are central concepts of our Christian faith. I encourage you all to get this book... Exclusion and Embrace is amazing, but this book is much more accessible for casual reading.

I'm spiritually starving. I really don't know how to explain how I'm feeling better than that. (Maybe it's because I go to Fuller.) This past weekend Kyle, my good friend from Texas A&M, came to come ski and visit, and we got all beat up and had great fun. But Sunday I had a profound experience: we went in the morning (per my typical Sunday ritual) to the Church in the Park to help feed people who are homeless, and I took notice of the obvious starvation that many of these kind and grateful people faced...those who had their spoons in their mouths while still in line for more food. The other half of my Sunday ritual (minus Ultimate frisbee, which I skipped) is going to Warehouse, my church, and this particular evening focused on reflection and worship music, and culminated in communion. And the sense that I had as I sat in a trance-like prayer (which is really strange for me) prior to taking communion was that I was starving, with a yearning for grace that was not unlike one would yearn for food, but finding myself at best reluctant to receive that grace. It was surreal, and the kind of experience that I have not had in a long time. I'm hoping that this Lenten season will help me understand God's grace better, and how I can rightly respond to it, as someone who is trying to be a faithful disciple.

In the midst of craziness, but I had to check this out...

Read this article by Fuller's own Kara Powell, if you're interested for the future, or have ever gone on a short-term missions trip. It raises some important issues that we as Westernized Christians who do these trips must contend with and be honest about. I loved going to Africa this summer, but I did struggle with the real "help" I was providing. It's one reason I decided to help sponsor one of the children in Ilula: so I can remain connected in some way with their community...I am also wanting to take a trip this summer somewhere (possibly Cambodia, Zambia, or Venezuela)...this would also be for school credit, but this article reminds me of the things that I wrestled with in my Incarnation and Mission class last quarter, and how I need to consider the needs of the people that we seek to serve before my own desire to feel "helpful."

This is also why my "project" (for lack of a better term) at my church...not the Kingdom Assignment (as dubbed) but something I've been working on before that... is something that I've become passionate about...an entire church community seeking regular, consistent time with the downtrodden and oppressed, welcoming them into community and engaging in mutual exchanges with them. This is all very vague and cryptic, but i don't have the time (or energy :( ) to explain. I will post on this again soon, in hopes that people out there in the wide world of cyberspace will pass on wisdom, encouragement, criticism, etc.

new look. new assignment.

My blog got a makeover this week. Even though I still have no clue what I'm doing. I need help with making my blog more reader-friendly. Anyone out there willing to help?

It's been an eventful week thus far...this weekend my friend Kyle from Texas is coming to CA to go skiing w/ me and some friends at Mammoth. Way excited.



The interim pastor at Lake Avenue Church (my church Warehouse's big brother church, came to preach for us last Sunday night, about God and money. He talked a lot about stewardship and the importance of recognizing our money as not belonging to us but to God, and living accordingly. He then went on to ask for volunteers from the audience...I was one of them. He handed each of us a 100$ bill and said, "You can take this money if you realize that a) this is God's money, not yours, b) you can do whatever you want w/ it, so long as it serves to further the kingdom of God, and c) you must report back to the church in 60 days what I did w/ the money."

So now I'm on a Kingdom Assignment. There's four of us from my church hub that volunteered, so we have 400$ pooled together. Anyone have any ideas of what we can do?

what a night to finally turn on the Olympics.

Lindsey Jacobellis was in a clear route to victory in the first ever Olympic women's snowboard cross. She had survived some very tough competition in the previous runs, she fought her way to the lead after coming from the far side of the track to cut in front of everyone, and two of the trailers ended up wiping out bad (one left the mountain on a stretcher). She had a commanding lead by the home stretch, no one was close; she only had to coast for the gold. Then she did a method air on the last jump to show off for the crowd. Then she fell. And she ended up getting the silver.

Jerry Seinfeld comes to mind: In the Olympics, gold is great, of course; bronze is at least something. But silver is like the Committee saying, "Congratulations. You're the first loser. No one lost better than you."

My dad also comes to mind: Don't showboat. Don't hog the ball; don't be afraid to use the backboard; play it safe. Jacobellis could've used my dad's help last night.

This afternoon I'm recovering from a 4-hour marathon Ultimate frisbee excursion. And beginning work on my Gospels paper. Hopefully I can stay awake.

(btw... this is my first post w/ a pic! Quite a moment for blogging history. Hopefully it turns out.)

some notes from the volf conference.

1. Theology is for a way of life. We only speak of God at the point of intersection between God and humanity. Theology guides the church into a way of viewing the Christian faith in the context of our tradition and particular practices. It is intended to be a relevant practice; often theology refuses to be relevant. Volf seeks to maintain relevance by speaking about how God relates to particular issues of our world.

2. Is theology "systematic"? Theology helps us to see how things "fit" together; it aids our understanding of Christianity in that it provides consistency to our beliefs. But we must be careful about this... our Scriptures aren't neat and orderly like we would like them to be, and we shouldn't attempt to cram everything into the same suitcase of theology...yet we can't leave these things behind, either! Volf suggests letting them "dangle out of the suitcase," or, taking these things as carry-ons luggage. The complex things of the faith are seen as resources and not competitors to our theology. This requires patience, and humility, as well as a respect for our Scripture.

3. Christians are in the precarious position of attempting to avoid both sectarianism (by defining ourselves as what the world is NOT) and radical accomodation (reshaping our faith based on the surrounding culture). This is where Volf's(admittedly messy) idea of "embrace" (opening ourselves to the "other") and "double vision" (Attempting to see/understand the world through the "other's" eyes)can be helpful tools for theology. It is good for Christians to enter into the world, into the "pluralistic marketplace," and with an attitude of humility and respect, attempt to both proclaim and learn.

4. Volf is a pacifist, but he does not shy away (as many Christians do) from the idea of a God who seeks justice. God in his holiness demands justice, and becomes violent in reponse... that violence being directed towards the violence of humanity. Volf speaks about justice in terms of the violence that we invoke towards one another-- and that there will be a "leveling" of the playing field one day. God is patient with those who perpetrate violence, and does everything he can to penetrate their hearts (e.g. die for them on a cross). Yet the incessance of perpetrators, combined with the impatience of the victims who cry out, "How long, o Lord?" allows the possibility/justification for a divine violence. (Volf is hopeful, however, that God's mercy (invoked by the perpetrator's surrender) will be the last word.)

5. Christians, however, follow the model of Christ and submit to the violence of the world, and in doing so enacting violence upon violence. This is the only option for us; seeking justice through violence is in the hands of God alone; we do not take up the sword. (We must also consider how we perpetrate violence of various kinds--by excluding others, unjust economic systems, pride and ignorance, racism and prejudice, insistence on a Western perspective, refusing to show love to the least of these, etc.-- and repent.)


6. Indifference is a scary thing; Volf states that those who are indifferent to God, even as a self-proclaimed "Christian," is farther away from God than the staunch atheist (e.g. Nietzche), who takes God seriously enough to deny him! Indifference is a drug that numbs us from "feeling," from loving.

7. God is closer to us than we are to ourselves. There is no exit from God's relationship to us.

8. Volf spoke on atonement theories a little bit: There are two traditional views popular today: the substitutionary atonement theory (e.g. Anselm), and the identification theory (e.g. like Abelard). (Christus Victor is closely related to the former; think Narnia.) These are traditional conservative and liberal understandings, respectively. Volf likes the term inclusive substitution; Christ performs a substitutionary act in which we are present with him at the cross. (echo of Paul: "I have been crucified w/ Christ") In an important sense, the violence rendered to Christ was rendered to us as well. In some sense, therefore, we do identify with Christ, although it is not a mere identification. (Complicated idea, I know. What do you expect from atonement theories?)

9. Chew on this: God takes the anger of God onto God.

10. The church has an important role in His plan for the world's redemption. Yet the Gospel remains above the church--thankfully, considering the number of times the church has failed the Gospel in our history. Volf states (and I share this sentiment) that his experience with the church would not lead to a faith in God; it is his confrontation with the Gospel that has resulted in faith.

We also had "breakout" groups during the conference; mine discussed social justice, Volf, and emergent. I have some thoughts from that convo, but I'll save them for later.

sick.

So the doctor says I have a colon infection. How exciting is that?

As a result, I haven't really been myself since I've gotten home. (I felt great, thankfully, during the trip, just bad before and after.) I'm on antibiotics and I'm going to try and go to the beach tonight w/ some of the Fullerites. Prayers are appeciated.

Attempts to define "emergent."

During the conference I had more than a few conversations that went something like this:

Josh: "There is a lot of confusion today in the church about what 'emergent' is. "

Random emergent guy: "Well, I guess that includes me, too."

(This was quickly followed by Josh simutaneously experiencing both a sense of confused ignorance and of warm identification.)

To highlight this, Wikipedia (which is a wonderful resource that I am only partially familiar with)has put a cleanup tag on the "emerging church" article. The article's too "messy." Go figure.

Take a look at some of the editorial comments-- just to be amused, or perhaps to help clean the article up.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Talk:Emerging_Church

Back from the Volf conference.

So I'm posting again... I just got back from the emergent conference, feeling very "emergent," although quite tired and having a barrel-full of work to do. To quickly sum, here are some convictions I've come to from this week:

1) New York City is an amazing phenomenon and landmark of American history. And it's just stinkin' cool. I found my great-g'father's manuscript from when he got off the boat at Ellis Island, I looked up the Statue of Liberty's dress, I visited St. Paul's Chapel, Washington's pew, the WTC site, Times Square, saw the Phantom of the Opera on Broadway, watched the Super Bowl in Greenwich.... all great fun.

2) My blog sucks and needs pictures. And postings, for that matter.

3) I am a selfish American bastard who is very thankful that God is patient with him.

4) Miroslav Volf has more intellect in his snot-rockets than most of us...yet he still manages to be incredibly humble and to have a generous spirit.

5) There are amazing people doing amazing things in churches and leadership boards around the country...which I would do well to remember when I'm about ready to cast American churches into Gehenna.

6) Going on long trips without my CDs is a bad idea.

7) It will take a long time before I am able to process this week fully. Hopefully getting into the blog conversation with others from the conference will help.

And in that vein, I plan to start posting more regularly... so more to come soon.

Mammon!

I'm taking (finally) a class by Marianne Meye Thompson this upcoming winter--a class on the Gospels. She posted the following on her webpage:

http://www.fuller.edu/sot/faculty/thompson_marianne/cp_content/homepage/mammon.pdf

My day getting caught up on the blog world.

I'm not really good at this blogging thing, as noted by the frequency of my posts. But after spending the day yesterday with Emergent guru and urban ministry extraordinaire Rudy Carrasco (if he read that characterization, he would likely wince a little) I have become inspired to read up. Actually, I've been stalling from getting my classwork done. I'm convinced the "blog-world" wouldn't exist if it wasn't for college and grad students procrastinating on their papers and projects.

I really enjoyed my time with Rudy. Always cool to meet leaders who are honest with themselves and others. And the work going down at Harambee in Pasadena is first-rate incarnational ministry and discipleship. I'm excited to see where my community goes as a result of their work. It'll also be cool to see him again in Yale in February, since he's also planning to see Miroslav Volf and company at the Emergent Conversation.

So, check out Rudy's blog at http://urbanonramps.com/ ...his page has more links than a sausage factory, so this can keep you busy... ya know, if you have a paper due or something.

He posted yesterday on an article regarding evolution, creation, and theistic evolutionary theories . A good synopsis of the current debate. I particularly enjoyed the quote by St. Augustine at the very end of the article:

"'If we come to read anything in Holy Scripture,' he wrote 16 centuries ago, 'that is in keeping with the faith in which we are steeped, capable of several meanings, we must not by obstinately rushing in, so commit ourselves to any one of them that, when perhaps the truth is more thoroughly investigated, it rightly falls to the ground and we with it.'"

See? Even Augustine was postmodern!

(Btw... why is it so hard for people to admit that they don't understanding everything? Seems to me that if God were God, there might be some things which He understands that we are not meant to understand, or at least are incapable of grasping. Why do we have a need to control God, packaging Him in such a way so as to confine Him to our own limited understandings? This is surely reductionism at its most insidious. To fundies I say, Let God be free, damnit. Let him bowl you over with His radical love and grace. Let him confront you in the dark corners of your heart which you have felt comfortable in distinguishing from your life of faith.

Augh. This point has been run into the dirt by others already. I digress.)

I also found on Emergent Village an article which gives a great summary of "neo-evangelicalism" or "progressive evangelicalism" or whatever you want to call it. This is a simple description of the shifting of views taking place in the church and in seminaries in the US. If if resonates with you, congratulations. You're well on your way to becoming labeled as a flaming liberal by ill-informed people.

This is more rambling than anything else. I guess that means I'm becoming a dime-a-dozen, crazy, hot-headed emergent blogger.

Or, I'm just really not wanting to do my homework.